Isaku (sirmadness) wrote,

My first adult post.

Dear world.

I may never get around to updating this ever again. And it's always been more-or-less aimed at a select few in the audience, so it's time to a) Acknowledge that fact, and
b) make a mark worth making on the world.

Throughout human history, letters are often all that remain of a person long after they are dead. Hopefully these will somehow remain after I am gone.

(So what do you have to say?)

Life was worth living.

Power, Money, Fame, Happiness.
For a meaningful life, Love was no less worth pursuing.

Saw Japan. It was more than words could ever say to someone like me. How do you describe the most wonderful, over-awing, overwhelming, overriding, fear-inspiring experience of your life?

Japan was worth living long enough to see. It will never love me like I love Japan, and somehow that's okay. It shouldn't have to.

You were worth meeting. Loving. Knowing.

If I have one regret in this life it's the following:
I'm sorry I never got to say the perfect words that would have made it all better.

I regret every time I ever got upset ever for any reason. It never once did any good. It never once changed a thing.

Never, ever, ever get upset. It's simply not going to help.

(that's two regrets)

oh shut up, it flowed better the way I wrote it!

(Where are you now?)

In University. Gonna graduate in April. Who knew? I really could do it after all.

At home. With my family. My loving partner of 6.5 years who will be with me until the end of time, and our wonderful third half, who is embarking upon a journey of personal self-fulfillment I would never wish on anyone, and they are going to be spectacular at it, no matter how much they think they're never going to achieve their dreams...

More-or-less the default Medicine carrier for my family...such as it is. Believing in the Creator by default, but not trusting much that isn't firmly grounded in scientific proof. I do believe the placebo effect of certain spiritual practices is ultimately a net-benefit for society, which is why I think that religion/gods have a place in human evolution...

(What are you going to do?)

Live, I guess. Until I can't. Go to Japan, unless I can't. Sing, unless I'm too lazy. Translate. Interpret. Get my driver's (hah!) and get a house. who knows. time in my 40s for that.

And wait for closure.

possibly forever...but that's okay. I'll have deserved it.

Right all the wrongs I've done, if that is humanly possible.

And forgive....And really try hard to mean it.

(any hard feelings?)


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